It's already lunch time.
I went to the canteen to have my lunch and as I enter the cafeteria, you can hear the loud noise of all the students inside this cafeteria and the sound coming from the spoon and fork that is carelessly used by the students.
You can sense that there is no peace at all here though I am already immune to that because in my 4 years here, it is the same scenario here in the cafeteria. It is totally crowded and unorganized but anyway I don't have a choice because this is the only place where I can have my favorite thing in this world and that is FOOOODDD. I line up to get my food because I am really starving.
So, basically, I don't have accompany with me right now, since my bestfriend is from another section, Yeah, that was so sad. I don't have much of a friend since I am silent type and I truly treasure my real friends. I don't need friends who just want to be with you because you are beneficial to them. Real talk. Those are fake friends. We part ways only this year because I remain in the star section. Don't get me wrong, my friend Stacy is an intelligent one its just that she is just lazy when studying and I have to motivate her always though she really excels in extra-curricular activities.
I look around to see if she is already here but I guess not maybe she is busy. After getting my food I search for a seat where I can eat luckily got one, a four- seater table and it is not in the much crowded area since it is really on the left side of the cafeteria. The moment I sit on the chair I just do the sign of the cross and eat the servings. I did not wait for my bestfriend because I am really starving to death and I still have to attend classes and I don't want to be late. I will just wait her while she is eating. She also said that she has something to say to me, I'm craving to know the info.
I saw other people looking at me, maybe because I am eating alone, well I don't care. Aside from that, I have also this nerdy geek look that adds up to the sympathy look that other students throwing at me.
Why can't you just let people enjoy and do things on their own, even alone? Why this world so judgmental? There is nothing wrong being alone, I am not even sad about it, I enjoy it. I don't need your empathy, mind your own. Those are things going on my mind right now.
I just shrugged my head and continue eating my food. I just love food this is my comfort. When I am up to the last bite of my food, someone caught my attention, that truly shocks my existence.
"Hi!" he said while smiling.
I don't know what to say. My heart went faster. I am melting form his smiles
"H--iii" I said to him. I just said "Hi" and I am just like stuttering. Oh my gosh! I can't do this anymore.
"Can I just sit here for a while. I'm just waiting for someone." I want to know whom he waits maybe Gian, his cousin, anyways thanks to him, I have a moment with Benedict.
"O-kay." I just said then he seat in front of me and he got his phone. He is now busy scrolling on his phone. Oh my gosh! He is seating in front of me and we are one meter away from each other.
Don't get me wrong. I am not blushing and giggling for nothing. The man in front of me is Benedict, my all-time crush ever since freshman year. And now for the first time. I'm having my first interaction with him. No one knows that I have a crush on him even Stacy. I just keep it to myself because the more other people know it, the more things will be complicated and I don't like that. I want to keep it simple. I am happy and contented looking him at far. I know we are in 2020 era and things like hearthrob of the school does not exist already but for me he is. He is famous because he is a good-looking fine man and represent the school in some extra-curricular activities and also student council officer. Eventhough, he is in the second section of our Grade still he tops their section and for me he is still good. So yeah, how would I keep my self calm at the moment. I also know is that he doesn't have a girlfriend. hmm can I apply? Kidding. My flirty side is showing.
I shrugged my head because of the last thought I had in mind and just fixed my hair for a while because I might look like grumpy right now and that will be so embarassing. It is not my usual thing that I fix my hair but now I did. The power of love is burning. Kidding.
He is busy using his phone and I simply looking at him secretly. He is so handsome on this angle. He has no pores and indeed clear skin.
I still have my banana that I would love to eat but I refuse because I guess it is inappropriate to eat here in front of him that's why I just open my chips. I will just save the banana for later snack. The moment I open it, he stares at me. Maybe I made a loud noise. I felt embarassed.
"Sor--ry, Yo--u want?" I asked him.
He shrugged his head and just smile.
"I'm okay, thanks." then he keeps on staring at me and kinda' examine my face . What is that for?
"Umm, Are you Elisa, right?" he asked. Why does she know my name? My face turning into red I can feel it.
I nodded.
"Oh, you are the editor-in chief of our school publication, I read some of your works that is amazing. I also heard good things about you from my friend"
How to keep calm? My heart beats faster that it feels like it wants to escape from my bodty. The fact that he knows me, he read my works that is actually for him,( I used my platform to show my secret love for him), he compliments me, and he heard a lot of things about me. I think I'm about to breakdown for a moment.
"Thanks" The only thing I said and just smile.
Are we destined for each other? I mean it is kinda OA, Then why of all people he will seat beside me, having conversation with me and knows about me. Those are the part in the romantic films and kdramas that the lead get to know each other, inlove--- okay that is too much.
To calm myself I just look around to lose his sight on me. I just can't keep up with his stares. Some students are already leaving the cafeteria. From a far, I saw my bestfriend, going from our direction. The moment I saw her, I wave.
"Sorry, I have to do something urgent, did you eat already?" She said while looking not to me but to Benedict.
The moment he sat beside Benedict, she recognized me.
"Oh, hi, bestfriend" she smiled at me.
"You meet already?" she said looking to the both of us.
"Yeah but she didn't know yet. " Wait what's going on? I am confused. What is something I need to know?
"Know what?" I asked Stacy.
She asked me to lean closer to her to hear her whisper.
"Benedict and I are in a relationship. For a month already." I get the gist of the things that is happening now but it still painful hearing it from them. I think my heart was about to broke for a moment. The giggling that I felt awhile ago was vanished. I can't help it but I am totally hurt. My bestfriend and my long-time crush are in a relationship. How cruel the world is.
I was breaking inside but still manage to smile to them I don't want to ruin the moment just because of my unrequited and unsung love to Benedict.
" Oh, really? I'm happy for the both of you" I smiled
"Thank you, friend. This is the thing I want to make chika with you but let us keep it secret first, okay. We are waiting for the right time" I won't bother if you didn't make kwento about your relationship and keep it secret, I won't tell anyway. I'm okay.
"You are always on our topic, Elisa, you are really a good friend to Stacy. Anyways, Stacy is really a good catch and he pinch Stacy's nose" Okay, so the friend who always talks about me is Stacy.
I just smiled but I'm broke inside.
"Babe, stop other might see us" Stacy said while hitting Benedict softly. She is really kilig. They are too cheesy. Ewww. PDA in front of me, well I'm okay.
"You can join and hang-out with us for some time." Stacy said to me. I won't mind being alone.
"Yeah, sure next time." I lied.
I have to cut them off and tell them I need to go to class.
"Okay, friend see you some other time" I just smiled and walk away from the scene.
The moment I am away from them the fake smile was gone and true emotion revealed. My tears keep coming and I can't help it. Why does of all people, my bestfriend? I can't handle the idea that I have to be with them, when they are together and imagining those things was quite a burden for me. What a small world it is. I just went to the powder room to fix myself.
I look at my clock and it is already 1:15 pm. I am late for 15 minutes on my class but I wont mind. Cutting class for once was quite a good idea because I am not in the mood to listen to class especially now that I have all in mind is the pain that I felt. Having a sanction was less painful than this pain I have. I know its kinda OA but this is my first time being heartbroken just as the first time I interact with my crush. You can really feel both emotions in a span of time. For a while, I am happy that he is beside me and even had the idea that we are destined together then I became sad because reality hit me right on my face. The power of feelings are so intense. That's what they say don't be too happy because it will reciprocate and bad things will happen.
I just go to clinic and have some rest or whatever, I will just lie that I am sick so I can cut class. Before I leave the powder room, I look at the mirror wipe the tears fell down on my face and utter this words.
"I HATE YOU DESTINY. I HATE YOU KDRAMAS"
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